Who am i ?

Who am i ?
Am i your friend ?
No that i wont be you never call a friend to sleep with you...
Am i your love ?
No i am not even your love you never make love with your love without love...
Am i your wife ?
No i know i am not because i heard her ignorant caring voice asking you to "take care"...
Am i your daughter ?
No i don't think i am no one ever kisses ones daughter so deeply and passionately onto her lips.....
As you always said you admired me as a goddess..
As a goddess would always remain silent...
No i know i am not a goddess either if i would have been you would have atleast bowed down and respected me once....
Who am i? Tell me.. Who am i?

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I want to shout , i want to cry aloud , i want to hug u and never leave u
I want to tell you please take me away with you
Or i fear i might no more be there...
Didn't you see me entering into your eyes and trying to find a space
So that i could stay in there forever , so that i could be seen by none other...
Didn't you hear my breath screaming trying hard to reach your ears...
Requesting " Let me come with you"..
Didn't you feel my hands trying hard to grip you,
Urging you to stop and look back...
Didn't you see tears rolling down my smile..
Expecting you to wait for a moment and ask me to come with you....
I want to shout , i want to cry aloud , i want to hug u and never leave u
I want to tell you please take me away with you
Or i fear i might no more be there...

I walked not alone.....

I walked not alone but ...
i Knew you were there somewhere...
Hidden .. enjoying me and my madness...
I knew you would smile silently...
Standing there willing to come and hold my hands and walk....
I walked not alone but....
I knew you would come when i got stuck at the crossroads...
Confident ... willing to guide me...
I knew you would pull me and walk along....
The confused streets despite of my unwillingness to open my eyes...
I walked not alone but....
Blissed with your presence.. I opend my eyes looked around....
The warmth of you breath has still not disappeared but...
You werent there anywhere....
I walked not alone but.....
Walked with your hidden smile in me
walked with the confidence of your words....
Little did i know few journeys are short lived....
I walked not alone but........

Its better to be quite.......

Its better to be quite , that's what I always did,
When you asked me if i like you ,,i thought ,
Its better to be quite as i always did..
When i saw them pulling my soul out of me,,,
Its better to be quite i said to myself...
when i saw my house collapsing and i needed a pillar to lean..
Its better to be quite and stand alone i decided...
When thousands of words came out as tears.. I felt
Its better to be quite and sleep over it...
When i silently heard all the lies said to me.. I realized
Its better to be quite and smile as a child...
When all relations, all belongings, every word and every color seemed
As fake as an illusion...i decided...
Its better to be quite and disappear into ashes with the furious breeze...



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................................

I remember
I remember how i hugged you and slept on a chilling cold winter morning
the only thing i could hear was your breath and your heart beat and
a train passing by from a far of distance seemed to break the ice of this silent chilling winter morning....
I remember how we friends walked on an highway on a summer afternoon
it was our laughter and giggles that filled my world and
a train passing by from a far of distance seemed to break the silence of this pleasant summer afternoon....
I remember how me, mom and dad sat together clueless on a rainy evening
it was their sighs , the water dripping outside the window that interrupted my thoughts and
a train passing by from a far of distance seemed to break the not so pleasant silence of the rainy evening
I remember the crowded railway station on a cool cloudy summer evening
many smiling faces, many clueless faces, many silent faces
It was few waving hands that made me realize that the train was moving ....and
all i could hear was your breath and your heart beat,
my friends laughter and giggles, silent sighs of my parents and the water dripping outside the window..............

I welcome you ........

You would see life and happiness in every other face u meet..
you would see only possibilities of everything nothing's impossible for this city and people here,
you would see positive vibrations at the same time
you come through harsh truths...
no one is there for you all are alone
all are blank deep within
running after things they don't know ...
and u find some regretting tired faces too
who have spent their entire life traveling in local trains
living for others and then being left alone at the end ....
every street.... every pillar .....
every beggar... every new person who arrives .....
every student ... .every couple ....
every taxi driver .. every prostitute...
has a different story to tell...
you should definitely come here
to Mumbai once and you would know what love is .....
whats loneliness.....whats struggle...
whats achievement... whats happiness.....
Who you are and...... what life is....

I know I am Happyy.......

I know am Lonely
but Still am Happy
i know i am waiting for you
but still am happy
i know am broken from deep within
but still am happy
i know i trusted you
but still am happy
i know i am walking alone
but still am happy
i know i miss you while crossing roads
but still am happy
i know i miss those messages of yours
but still am happy
i know i miss the way you cared
but still am happy
i know i miss you every morning
but still am happy
i know i miss you while i have food
but still am happy
i know i miss you when i watch a movie alone
but still am happy
i know i miss you when i travel alone in an auto
but still am happy
i know i was hurt when you told me that whatever hapened btwn us shouldnt have happnd
but still am happy
i know i still eagerly wait for you to call me once
but stilll am happy
i know i misss u like hell and you dnt
but still am happy